We were drunk and stupid, and we needed to piss really badly.
We'd passed the McDonald's, the Taco Bell, and every community beach park bathroom there was. So, the limo pulled up right to the cave, and in we went, pissed all over the walls even though it was putrid and dank. Then we jumped in the limo and drove off to Keawa'ula beach for wedding party pictures. When it was time to go, the limo wouldn't start, so the ushers and I jumped into the bridal party limo. We got to Ko'olina in time for the ceremony, and everything went off without a hitch. The following day, when it was time to open the wedding presents and cards, the ushers didn't show. They were nowhere to be found. Some of the women in the bridal party were worried because they were the wives and girlfriends of the ushers. The ushers were all stuck in the toilets in their rooms. They couldn't stop urinating. If that wasn't bad enough, the room itself had a purtid, dank smell, like... in the cave.It was going to take a lot of cleaning and disinfecting, but we all drove those guys back to the cave while they pissed themselves the whole time. They had to apologize for what they did, and mean it. In front of a visiting school group, they did it.
Sincerely.
Did things go back to normal? Not right away. The ushers had horrible nightmares for a month. Only then did things return to normal for them. Such as it was,
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